Posts Tagged With: love

Transition, Move, Save Home

I’ve three goals in my life:

Saving family home, the only home we have, from mortgage debt kicking us out. My parents are sickly, and they do all they can, but it’s not enough even with all I have. Mother just recently dug herself out of the grasp of cancer, and my father is diabetic, obese, and just plain ol old. They’re good people, but that’s why banks are so hard on their backs.

Moving out, preferably out of the country, and gaining a citizenship of some place else. In my language baggage I have English and German, and Scotland is very welcoming, so that’s my first option. The reason for this is also a third reason for this fundraiser.

I need, and I cannot stress it more than I NEED to start transitioning before I went mad. I have severe case of manic depression, and it slowly kills me. On top of it, I’m a transgender. The first I ever realized I’m not insane and this is a thing was late in my teenage years. Truly late. I really thought I should just be in mental institution, and tried often and hard to… End it. When I actually realized this is a thing, that there are such people, and that my brain is in tact – I felt nothing less from bliss. And even now in the darkest spells of depression, this is one of the very rare things that can help me get back on track: one day I might be whole.

So now that you got through short versions, here’s the long versions and a bonus:

Saving Home / Transition / Art Commissions, anyone?

P.S. Apologies for lack of pictures. It’s internet, and if there’s ever “before and after” of me on it, I wish it to be on my own terms, and not some malicious individual.

Categories: About Msg2TheMing, Creations, Little Joys, My Work, The Afterlife, Treasures | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

June Summary

I bet you thought I forgot, but I did not. So here it goes, good and bad of July.

The Good:


One of those days a friend came for a visit. With a bag of goodies we went to the calmest present place with no people around – cemetery. After a short wandering around, we found this nice metal bench to sit upon (disturbing no one), in front of a grave that belongs to someone I partially know (father of someone I do know). We had some tomato juice, a lot of sweets, and just chatted away in the rain, for it poured heavily with short periods of chill winds that dried us off quickly. We spoke of Witcher a lot, and then delved into the history of that chapel you can see in the picture. It belonged to Lithuanian and French-Lithuanian boyars of sorts, and has a very great echo that you can hear from the doors. Those same people owned a nearby mansion that was once a school, once a hospital, now is being restored and belongs to hell knows who.


Then there’s this whole mail and moral support thing, out of which I feel like I can only mention one, being a box full off fantastic goodies, out of which what you are seeing in the picture are mostly wrappers that I kept, because I’m one of those guys, yes. I don’t deserve the friends I’ve got, but they somehow still insist, and then I end up trying not to cry when I realize they cared so very much. It’s not about the things, the sweets, or even that wonderful tea. It’s all about the words within, the thought, the little things mentioned that allow you to understand: we might not have spoken, but I was not alone, and I am not alone now either.


I received the Ferals book as promised, it was pretty good too. I also tidied up my book collection, picking out all I can give up without feeling the need to stab myself. I think it worked out pretty well.

Received a copy of Dying Light (and The Following), and almost completely finished it up with a friend. Co-op mode in this is like that in Saints Row – NPC’s treat you as one person, but you do everything together. Well made game, truly. Ubisoft should take notes.

Also watched brand new season of Orange is the New Black (sorry, Game of Thrones is really turning out to be not my cup of tea, the more I watch it, the less I want to, so not gonna happen), and am very pleased with how this is going. Not pleased with the wait for next season. But then pleased again, because a friend decided to at last give it a shot, and she likes it too!

There were more small and big things, and I am grateful for all of them, Thank You.

The Bad:

Bad things are bad still. Mother’s shoulder ligaments progressed out of 7mm break into 7cm break very rapidly. Her weight is insane, I can see her collar bone shape and ribs, and it scares me.

Sibling is being an asshole on colossal levels, I don’t even know how is that even possible. But seems people function properly having no brain, and no heart to speak of. Her daughter cries when grandma leaves, and she’s one year old, so be the judge of that.

Debts have put us at risk of being evicted. It’s 700 euros we’re talking about, and that’s the minimum that would merely pull us through. It’s beyond me, especially now that I’m working last days in the translating offices. It’s a funny and scary thing. We’ve very close to stepping on safe ground, and yet we have no┬ámeans to reach it, therefor we’re just as close in tumbling off into an abyss with no way back. If anyone considers helping, please do, I’m all about those good vibes, shares, and payments on time that I can’t ever afford: [Fundraiser]

Categories: About Msg2TheMing, The Afterlife | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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